The End of an Era

This is my last blog post at Praying for Pink. Here are my closing thoughts as I turn towards helping Activation ReACT help families in environmental distress from hurricanes, tornadoes, and such. But before I go here are some words for Zoey (and a reminder for us all)....

This blog was started the day I found out I was having a girl. I was terrified that Zoey would turn out like me, stuck in Cape May County and never explore what the world has to offer. I fear all of my children become complacent and find nothing but what comes to them.

Zoey is now 4. My words to Zoey will continue in a book between my kids and I even though this blog has stopped. I have shared wonderful moments with you all as a source of community and friendship for those that are on a similar journey in motherhood. The blogging industry has changed and so have I. For me, this is the end of an era. I still will be in the social space. Exciting opportunities are ahead for the whole family. New projects and new adventures await. Exciting Things!

Dear Zoey,

Zoey, you have made me a better mother. Your brothers did a great job until 4 years ago. I hyper-ventilated when I found out I was pregnant with a girl.  I started dreaming of what a daughter would be like, and you are nothing like it!  You are so much more.  You have always been so close to perfection that I often thought heaven would take you away from me too soon. It has caused me great anxiety. There also were your terrible twos that had their honest moments of parenting at its hardest. The love though always remained. It has been a legitimate fear for me that your existence was just a dream. But here, you are here.

Every day is gift. The 3 of you have made me who I am. You all have taught me more in 14 years than I think I will ever be able to teach you. But, these things are my closing thoughts. They are important to me that you know these things.

1. Be you and get excited: so many things make you laugh. As I know too well, the world will try to steal that from you. Find things you love. There is nobody else in the world like you. Take joy in that. Be proud. Rock your uniqueness. It is a strength.

2. Kindness isn't just a word and requires balance: The world is cruel. It's hard to not be sucked into the cruel parts. Be kind but you have my permission to not be weak. You are not a doormat.  Smile often. Kindness is always the preferred path. Choose your words carefully.  Don't be scared to stand up for what you believe in. It is ok to be mad and sad. You are allowed these emotions.

3. Popularity is not the same as having friends. Popularity is fleeting and friendships are forever.  True friends love you for who you are, even if you disagree. Search hard for your friends. You are a gift to them and they are a gift to you.

4. Manners are so important.  Learn how to eat at a table set with 4 forks. Chew with your mouth closed. Good manners will set you apart in all aspects of your life. They will matter in school, career, relationships, and just life. Always have manners.

5. Happiness is not something you can give. You can’t make another person happy. It is not our job. Find inner happiness. Treat others the way you want to be treated. Find your own path to happiness.

6. Admit when you are wrong: Take responsibility for your actions and stick by your word.  Admit when you’ve made a mistake.  Remember you are human.  Mistakes help us become the best versions of ourselves. Mistakes move us to learn and grow.  Forgive those that have made mistakes but there is nothing wrong with protecting you, and those you love, if you feel those mistakes are habit. Be responsible for your actions. Life happens fast. Judgement calls have to be made in split seconds and sometimes the calls are not correct. Admit it. Apologize. Learn. Grow. You are worth an apology.

7. Have courage to stand up for what is right.  Know that you are so strong. You have been since the moment you were born and ready to take on the world. You are capable of so many things. Surprise us both.

8. I love you. I may not "like" some of the choices you make in the future but make no doubt my love for you is endless. Together, We need to keep trying and keep loving.

9. There may be a lot of discipline, sorrow, or fear in life.  There also will be victories, joy, and happiness. You can't have one set from the other. Both provide perspective.

10. Don't dwell on the days, things, and moments you do not have. Focus on the time you did have. The things you do have, and the memories that were made. Make pictures in your mind and escape to them for inspiration.

I love you Z!


To my many readers, thank you for being you. Thank you for enjoying the life of Zoey for these past 4 years. It has been a joy sharing our blessings with you. Prayers are always appreciated.

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